Trump, stomping around in Oval Office, pouting petulantly, and randomly kicking furniture.

Trump: Ingrates! Ingrates! Ingrates! Rat fink ingrates, the whole lotta ’em!

Chief of Staff: Who’re these ungrateful fellas, who’ve got you so hot under the collar?

Trump: I’m all het up with those supposed buddies of mine – an’ who won’t help me with this war I’ve got on my hands.

CoS: Which buddies of yours are you talking about? Elon? Epstein? Can’t be Epstein, because you keep saying over and over you never knew him, and in any case, he’s long dead, and couldn’t help you even if he wanted to.

Trump: Don’t be a chump! I’m not talking about Elon, or Epstein, whoever he was, and who I never-ever knew at all in the first place. I’m talking about those meant-to-be pals of mine, like Germany, an’ France, an’ England, an’ all that lot who flat out refuse to help me, tellin’ me it’s my war, not theirs, and I should handle it any which way I can.

CoS: I’m sorry to say this, boss, but it is your war, and Israel’s, who talked you into getting into it, because it couldn’t do it on its lonesome.

Trump: But it’s not just my war, or Israel’s, this war’s for everybody. It’s for all of Europe, an’ England, an’ the Vatican, an’ all those poor an’ hungry people wherever the heck they are in the world, an’ for freedom, an’ for democracy, an’ for Rotary Club, an’ for Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts Movement, an’…(running out of steam, breath, and ans).

CoS: I think, I’ve got the point, Boss. So, what’re you going to do about these so-called pals, who’re not helping you?

Trump: I’ll tell you, what I’m not going to do – I’m not gonna do Nato anymore. From now, Nato’s become a Nat-no for me. So there!
CoS: Wow! That’s socking it to them, Boss. Serve them right for not helping you fight the war.

Trump: Fight the war? Are you nuts! I don’t want their help to fight the damn thing, I want their help to get me out of it…

END OF ARTICLE